A long long time ago
in a galaxy far away
Naboo was under an attack
And I thought me and Qui-Gon Jinn
Could talk the Federation into
Maybe cutting them a little slack
But their response, it didn't thrill us
They locked the doors and tried to kill us
We escaped from that gas
Then met Jar Jar and Boss Nass
We took a bongo from the scene
And we went to Theed to see the queen
We all wound up on Tatooine
That's where we found this boy...
Oh my my, this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later - now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
"Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
Did you know this junkyard slave
Isn't even old enough to shave
But he can use the Force they say
Ahh, do you see him hitting on the queen
Though he's just nine and she's fourteen
Yeah, he's probably gonna marry her someday
Well, I know he built C-3PO
And I've heard how fast his pod can go
And we were broke, it's true
So we made a wager or two
He was a prepubescent flyin' ace
And the minute Jabba started off that race
Well, I know who would win first place
Oh yes, it was our boy
We started singin'... My my, this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later - now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
"Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
Now we finally got to Coruscant
The Jedi Council we knew would want
To see how good the boy could be
So we took him there and we told the tale
How his midi-chlorians were off the scale
And he might fulfill that prophecy
Oh, the Council was impressed, of course
Could he bring balance to the Force?
They interviewed the kid
Oh, training they forbid
Because Yoda sensed in him much fear
And Qui-Gon said, "Now listen here
Just stick it in your pointy ear
I still will teach this boy"
He was singin'... My my, this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later - now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
"Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
We caught a ride back to Naboo
'Cause Queen Amidala wanted to
I frankly would've liked to stay
We all fought in that epic war
And it wasn't long at all before
Little Hotshot flew his plane and saved the day
And in the end some Gungans died
Some ships blew up and some pilots fried
A lot of folks were croakin'
The battle droids were broken
And the Jedi I admire most
Met up with Darth Maul and now he's toast
Well, I'm still here and he's a ghost
I guess I'll train this boy
And I was singin'... My my, this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later - now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
"Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
We were singin'... My my, this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later - now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi
(Vader with Sidious/Emporer)
It's not the east or the west side.
No it's not!
It's not the north or the south side.
No it's not!
It's the Dark side.
You are correct!
Keep frontin' the Empire,
To all you Vader-haters out there,
We'll blow your planet up!
What is thy bidding my master?
It's a disaster, Skywalker we're after.
What if he could be turned to the Dark side?
Yes, he'd be a powerful ally, another Dark Jedi.
He will join us or die!
We got death star!(Death Star!) x 8
And you know that we got it.(Death Star!)
And you know that we got it.(Death Star!) (fade after)
(Owen)
Luke, get your ass over here right now!
And quit monkeying around with that damned landspeeder,
where are them two droids I asked you to clean, boy?
You cleaned your room?
(Luke)
Uncle Owen, I know I'm on probation,
I cleaned the droids,
Can I go to the Toshi Station?
I gotta lay away on the power converter,
But now you treating me like a scruffy nerfherder!
(Obi-Wan)
Luke, use the Force and run,
Run to Degobah, Run to Degobah,
Luke, use the Force and run,
Run to Dagobah, Run to Dagobah.
(Yoda)
I'm Yoda,
I'm a soulja,
I'll mold ya, and fold ya,
I thought I told ya!
Don't be unwise judge me not by my size,
You wont believe your eyes,
Watch the X-wing rise!
(Luke)
Yoda, why you being a playa-hata?
You know still I must confront Lord Vader!
(Yoda)
But Luke, not ready are you!
(Luke)
But there's a city in the clouds where they keeping ma crew,
A Jedi's gotta do what a Jedi's gotta do,
so now Vader, I'm coming for you!
(Luke in X-Wing)
Yea, that's right R-2.,
Set a new course.
We're going to cloud city.
Ah. Thats a mighty good Gin and tonic
You should mix me up another?
(Lord Vader)
Impressive, now release yo' anger,
You must have sensed that yo' friends are in danger.
(Luke)
Ow! why did you slice off my hand?
(Lord Vader)
It's imperative that you understand.
Obi-Wan would never bother,
Telling you about your father.
(Luke)
He told me enough, he told me you killed him!
(Lord Vader)
Then there is something, I must reveal him.
I am yo' fatha,
I'm yo' fatha,
I am yo' fatha,
I'm yo' fatha,
I am yo' fatha,
I'm yo' fatha,
I am yo' fatha,
I'm yo' fatha'!
(Owen)
Knock him out the box, Luke,
Knock him out!
Knock him out the box, Luke,
Knock him out!
Knock him out the box, Luke,
Knock him out!
Knock him out the box, Luke,
Knock him out!
Knock him out the box, Luke.
Оригинал http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-d84U-MUsXg Lyrics Admiral: This is Admiral Biatch to base camp, it seems the stormtroopers have gone on strike and I have no experience with this type of shit. Who should I call for help? Vader: It’s the V to the A to the D-E-R (Vader!) Reconstructin’ the Death Star! With my slick suede suit that’s black like tar, Fucking you up no matter who you are! Palpatine: Tell them motherfuckers ’bout this here Dark Side! Pull up on your planet, Death Star drive-by! And we’ll beat the Rebels ’cause their skills ain’t shit! Vader: And in my TIE Fighter, Zig-zags stay lit! Yoda: Oh, shit! Yoda on the scene, 900 year fiend smoking Dagobah green! Bitches on my tip, like Lando on liquor. Lando: Ah, you’re just jealous ’cause my black dick’s thicker. Chewbacca: *Wookie yell* Lando: Yo! Tell ‘em Chewie, last night I had Leia all drunk wanting to do me. Luke: Shut the fuck up man! Leia’s my sister! The only thing you’re getting is a beat-off blister. Ben Kenobi: Luke! Use the force before intercourse, but Luke! Don’t forget! Bitches ain’t nothing but hos and tricks! (Ohh!) Luke: Obi-Wan, I’m the top gun! (top gun) The chosen one, hotter than both suns! Vader ain’t shit, his head’s cut up and split! He’s slower than the first Pentium chip! (Dark Side!) Vader: No one brings it worse to this fuckin’ universe! (Rebels!) Luke: You know we’ll fucking win, ’cause we’ll fight to the end! (Dark Side!) Palpatine: I can feel the anger dwelling within you! (Rebels!) Yoda: You also feel Vader’s dick in you. BIATCH! Jabba: [speaks Huttese] Han Solo: Jabba, you ain’t nothing but a fat-ass slug! Fake gold chains? You sorry-ass thug! Sittin’ in your palace with your blue-headed whore, trap door to the Rancor. *sound of someone falling* C3PO: Oh, my, goodness gracious me! I’m a gay man’s golden fantasy! Programmed for homo-ecstasy, ten million forms of gay positioning. For my golden shower, you must pay a fee, but R2-D2 gives it up for free. *R2-d2 squeaks* R2-D2, watch your language! Always having sex with robotic strangers! Jar Jar Binks: Meesa like to drink and smoke all night! Meesa like to fight and fucka yo wife. Meesa no care ’cause meesa so dumb. Meesa will fuck you with me tongue. Yousa wants a meesa cause meesa wants some. Yousa wants a meesa cause meesa wants some. Yousa wants a meesa cause meesa wants some. Meesa wants some cause meesa wanna cum! | Перевод http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k5cchyJ-qGs Перевод SkyStar Адмирал: Говорит адмирал Ебло, Похоже, вражеские истребители готовятся к атаке, И я не знаю, как сражаться с этим куском дерьма, Кто сможет нам помочь? Вейдер: Давай ВЕЙ, давай ДЕР (ВЕЙДЕР!) Звезду смерти заводим нахер, С моим гладким черным железным шлемом Я выебу любого, кем бы он не был! Палпатин: Расскажем хуесосам о тёмной стороне, Попрощайся с планетой, Звезда Смерти - везде! Мы перебьём всех повстанцев-недоростков, Вейдер: На моём TIE-Fighter'е это будет просто! Йода: Вот дерьмо! Выходит Йода 900-летний зелёный укурок еще в моде! Но тёлки без ума еще, не то, что от Ландо! Ландо: Завидуешь моему херу? Закрой свои гланды! Чубакка: *ревёт* Ландо: Йо! Скажи им, Чуви, как вчера Ебал принцессу Лею я по пьяни до утра! Люк: Заткни свою пасть! Она моя сестра! Единственная вещь, которую ты драл - твоя рука Оби-Ван: Люк! Используй свою силу, но... Во благо! Но люк... Не забывай! Сучары тоже сильны и хитры! (Оуу!) Люк: Оби-Ван, не ссы, я лучший! (лучший!) Чем два солнца горячее и говна круче! Вейдер - он дерьмо, мудак и тормоз, Первый Пентиум и то быстрее в стО раз! (Темная сторона!) Вейдер: То, что заставляет раскаиваться в этой грёбанной вселенной. (Повстанцы!) Люк: Знайте, мы вас заебём до самого победного конца! (Темная сторона!) Палпатин: Я могу ощущать страх внутри вас! (Повстанцы!) Йода: Вы также ощущаете хер Вейдера в своей жопе! БЛЯДЬ! Джабба: [читает на хаттском] Хан Соло: Джабба, ты толстая скользкая жопа! Любишь тусовки? Отожрал себе морду! Сидишь в своём дворце со шлюшкой с синей головой, И задротом Ранкором в пещере под тобой! C3PO: О, мой бог, простите, зараза! Я - золотая фонтазия любого пидораса! Запрограммированный для гомосятинских угроз, Десятки миллионов пидористических поз! Цена моего "золотого дождя" бесконечна, Но другу R2-D2 даю бесплатно вечно. Эй, маленький друг, покажи свой язык, В каждый новый компьютер суёшь самотык! Джа-джа Бинкс: Моя нравится смачно курить и бухать! Моя нравиться тайком твоя жена ебать! Моя без забот, потому что тупой, Моя ёбет всё, что поймает рукой! Твоя не любит моя, моя пиздит твоя! Твоя не любит моя, моя пиздит твоя! Твоя не любит моя, моя пиздит твоя! Таких как моя в этом фильме ни хуя! |